Robby’s Reboot

Greetings Letters readers, Robby from Brooklyn here, officially writing to you from his new home base in Oakland Park, Florida. Well, not an official home base but a home base for the time being and a different home base from the temporary home base set up before I officially moved here. But more on that a bit later. 

The move itself just did not go smoothly. It was a bit like me, my movements, my mannerisms, my expressions, and well just about ] everything else it seems in my life – messy, chaotic, jagged, rough. Maybe if I was a teenager today I would get tested for these characteristics, but being a kid from the 80s, we keep going and don’t need to name it. It’s part of who I am, and always have been. What makes me, me… but as I age it does seem to be getting more extreme and not less and these traits seem to have crept into the way my life just runs now.

Everything gets worse as we get older, eyesight, hearing, memory, and my ‘personality traits’ also seem to get more messy instead of less. Medications sometimes work and sometimes they don’t. And, frankly,  sometimes they make me not… well, me. FYI: don’t try buying prescription medications in Mexican pharmacies while on vacation. Long story short, that shit fucks up your system. Or maybe just mine. It really does sound like a cliche but everybody really does react differently to things, but I don’t advise taking your chances.

Moving at a faster speed, as this Italian New Yorker tends to do, coupled with a touch of messiness, is a disastrous combination. Most notably with electronics. Things break easily around me. Or I break things easily. I break lots of phones and every now and then a laptop. I’m the friend who always sends you a new phone number as a result of this breaking habit.. But I also am always trying to get the best deal.. Rest assured I think this 80’s kid just finally realized that you pay for what you get, better quality, better lasting.

But we rolled the dice sooooooo many times and now we are fucked. Fucked in the good way that we got to buy a new laptop and phone and get a new 954 number, but fucked as in I am locked out of almost every app, email, and social account you can think of. And without access to my accounts, I am lost. Lost, lost, lost. No GPS to even help.

And I know this is 1000% my fault, and I will and need to make a real commitment to change. 

But there are also some ‘you have got to be kidding me’ moments in all of this as well. I bought my new phone Tuesday and I called one of my besties Frank, and figured out how to get into Instagram and send messages to friends with my new number. 

Well, woke up Wednesday morning and I do not have one text message from anyone I sent my number to? I am not conceited, (no comments please) but that just doesn’t jive. Going back into the store – in the July Florida heat no less – turns out that the actual 954 number I have is registered to an IPHONE but I am/was on an ANDROID (another reason I should have bought an IPHONE instead lol) so the messages were being sent as imessages, and just hanging out in dead airspace somewhere. Ispace if you will.

So anyone that sent me a message yesterday has no idea that I didn’t get it. I mean, yeah ok, the teen technician fixed it, but seriously?  can I catch a mother fucking break somewhere!

But again, the blame is on me and the solution is on me as well. I need to take better care of things, including myself. It feels more and more like a rebirth down here instead of a move. Much to do in these coming days from doing something superficial and fun like finding a new gay gym to something important like finding your new gay doctor. Fun – joining an Intramural team. Important – setting up the first “Gays Against Guns: South Florida” meeting.

Florida Robby is taking shape and ready to start flying. Florida Robby needs to buy more summer clothes. Apparently, for a gay man my tank top wardrobe is surprisingly lacking, according to other gay men lol. Even though in the real non-gay world my tank top wardrobe is probably ginormous. First things first, new laptop. My roommate/friend has a BJ’s membership (no comments please) and we can order one online and pick it up right at the store. I love the ease and efficiency of suburban life. Hopefully, that can translate into my real life.

And as I reboot my new computer, I will be rebooting my life. Everything is new and everything is changing. A perfect chance to start fresh and tweak the parts of my life that might need some tweaking. No one is perfect. And no one is without imperfect characteristics. But, not to worry folks this is not a massive overhaul. Just a little TLC medicine if you will. It took me a long time to love myself. And I still love myself. I’m still going to be extra. Just be extra careful. Extra careful with my things and myself. And my new tank top collection. 

(**this column was originally published in “Letters from Camp Rehoboth.)